By Dr Renate Volpe

Take two tablets a day: one for serenity and another for gratitude.
(Punch drunk?)

Against the background of a year starting with:
• a wispy summer at best,
• a fragile business economy,
• beset by threatened job loss,
• rising food prices,
• the election of a president who has yet to prove himself,
• the frightening, ever present, brooding cloud of crime,
• the unwelcome perimeter presence and intermittent visitors named illness and death,
• topped by the now seriously cold winter days,
the human spirit of resilience is having “The Title Fight of its Life.”

As the storybook of life unfolds, irrespective of our state of life and individual context and peculiarities, it is inevitable that periods of stress and distress command much of the human condition.

However, more recently, it appears that a relentless sense of universal weariness, boredom, fear, meaninglessness, and lack of purpose are gaining ground.

Not one being given to extended periods of self-pity, I find myself asking what I and my fellow South Africans can do to avoid being sucked into a relentless vortex of despair and negativity?

What is there that we can do to lighten the seemingly weighty, spirit-sapping load?

Taking the boxing-ring analogy somewhat further, I myself being of sensitive persuasion have to work hard at remaining light on my feet, or mentally fit so to speak, as the rounds of life square me up against fitter and meaner opponents in the ring of life, many a time finding myself taking blow upon blow to the very spirit, essence and soul of my being.

Finding sound, logical, mental constructs for myself during given periods of stress allow for a re-emergence of mental stamina as the clanging bell heralds the next round in the ring, with the spectators baying expectantly for their anticipated entertainment.

So what of these mental constructs?
Some of these I will share, in the hope that they may ease your way for a moment, or a day, or perhaps a week at a time.

• One foot in front of another:
There is a story about a donkey that fell into a deep hole. As sand was thrown into the hole the donkey simply climbed up out of, and onto, each load of earth thrown onto it, until it was able to walk out of the hole.
• The philosophical approach:
A lady in her late eighties, in an old age home consistently maintains a harmonious manner. In spite of her own fragility she visits those less fortunate than herself and never complains. Upon being asked how she remains so elegantly positive she explains how she self medicates herself daily with one tablet for serenity in the mornings, and another taken for gratitude in the evenings.
• One day at a time:
When the pain of loss becomes too intense, when every door one turns to is slammed in ones face, when bodily illness or aches become more than one can bear, when people disappoint one and one feels lonely beyond bearing one can simply say: “This too will pass…………….”.
• Less is more.
We want far too much. We allow our lives to become immensely complex. Choice instead of being a privilege presents its own dilemmas and becomes a difficulty in and of itself. The more we have, the more we do, the more apparently important we become, the more we are seduced further away from ourselves and what matters to us, and that gives us meaning and purpose.
• Miracles do happen.
We wake up every day, we travel on highways and by ways and most times escape playing bumper cars. Our loved ones return home and choose to be by our side, flowers bloom, friends call to say they care, strangers smile and offer assistance, we have work, and provide for our loved ones, babies are born. Look around you, creation is a miracle, the fact that you feel, you think, you see.
• All we have is now.
The Buddhist philosophy of being fully in the moment, as we taste a fresh fruit, drive our car, enjoy the sunshine, look upon a loved one’s face, engage in a stimulating work discussion; focuses us on the essence of life. Yesterday IS gone, tomorrow HAS NOT come, we are here now, alive in this moment. We need to be wary of multi tasking and should avoid at all cost, buying into the “hurry disease” and in the process losing the value of the moment. Beware! catch yourself, be in the now, be fully engaged, don’t do e mails whilst talking to a friend or colleague on the phone, don’t glance furtively at the TV whilst your youngster is telling you about their day.
• Soul Talk.
Robbie Williams, worshipped both a as a musical genius and criticized just as gregariously for his eccentricities takes the role of universal sage as he sings the refrain “There is a hole in my soul, it is a real big place you can see it in my face.” We are all navigating an individual journey, no one has the answers. Just look around you. Some have material wealth, others have love and relationships. Still others have the varied gifts of intelligence or athleticism. Some appear to have it all, but their façade of arrogance hides the frightened child within. For some we have moments on soap boxes and believe ourselves to be important, yet when the box is taken away we crumble with fear and a sense of isolation, unimportance and insecurity. Perhaps, those whom appear to have little in the way of material goods, and whom we most often consider to be the ‘impoverished many’ have much? Simply by being close to the earth, and more in touch with the basic the necessities of life? The busier we are, the more complex our life is, the less quality of life we will experience.

For now and until we meet again I leave you with the words of an Irish Blessing:
May the wind be always at your back,
May the sun shine warm upon your face
and the rains fall soft upon your fields.

Dr Renate Volpe is a Leadership coach, author and key note speaker.
For enquiries please e mail Dr Renate Volpe, CEO of HIRS at Renate@hirs.co.za or call 011 455 0769 / 083 273 2687.